Our Planet is the Best Planet in the Whole World!

The words declared by my lovely 6 year old while standing in the middle of our garden. She goes on and on about how much she loves helping the earth and how important it is to take care of the earth.

All the while, Joe and I are busting our asses weeding the garden of the 2000 weeds that have taken hold after all the torrential downpours we've had in the past week. And noticing that our lovely child has no interest in really working in the garden, but REALLY loves talking about it. At least she provides entertainment. That's helpful, right?

A Michigan Miracle!

After the hardest job search I've ever witnessed and 'only' 5 months, he found a job! As I type this, he's at his first day of work, while I resume my job as Stay at Home Mom. And, as with his last job, the lunch he packed last night sits in the refrigerator...

The flu is going around the house as well. My 4 year old is recovering right now, but she's the easy one to care for. I'm just waiting for is to hit my 6 year old, who tends to lay around and cry when sick, refusing all food, liquids and medicine. Shudder... A year ago, she landed herself in the ER with severe dehydration, so we always resort to the threat of the hospital in order to get her to drink something. Luckily, we've also learned to stock the house with popsicles at all times in anticipation of sickness.

All in all, life is back to normal. I actually have somewhat mixed feelings about him going back to work, as I'd managed to find something I enjoyed doing for the first time that I can remember - substitute teaching. I'd landed a long-term position as a substitute parapro at a preschool. I was sad to tell them they'd have to find someone else. The pay was not enough to merit me staying on and changing the girls' routines at the end of the school year. I've got C signed up for half-day care at school after Kindergarten next school year, so I'll get going again in the fall. Meanwhile, I'm trying to get information about teaching certification. So far, the news isn't promising, but I've only inquired at one local college. Later this week I'm going to my alma mater, EMU, to find out if it'll take me less than 4 years, as another school informed me last week. Stay tuned...

What do you do when your life is thrown upside down?

Where to start? Last year, on the day before Halloween, my husband called me from the road. He said, 'Well, the good news is that I don't have to work late tonight. They let me go...' I'm not sure what my response was. whatthefuckdidyoujustsay?!?!?! I fell on the floor sobbing. It was dramatic. But this was the worst, and most unexpected news. We pay a mortgage, I'm a stay at home mom, we have two little girls, we have a ton of credit card debt. whatthefuckdowedo?!?!?! He’d worked for this company for 6 ½ years. They let him go on the 30th and shut off our health insurance the next day. I managed to stave off hyperventilating until I called my mom, got her crying, and lost my nut again. All the while, being followed by my 4-year-old, who was trying to figure out what was going on.

I'd bought a fine case of beer that day, as well as Daisy Scout supplies for my older daughter and myself, as I'd volunteered to lead a Daisy Scout troop at her school. I’d taken my 4 year old to the fabric store to pick out fabric for curtains for her room. I felt like an idiot, with my car full of things. Things we could no longer afford, and really couldn't afford in the first place, given the debt we were already in. It suddenly became clear how little we had, in terms of money, and how little I wanted those things. As soon as I regained my composure, I started reloading the car. I couldn't return those things fast enough. I started throwing out junk. I cleaned the fridge. I figured we'd move, very soon. I was paring down, getting ready for it.

The next day was Halloween. The girls were so excited. I'd made them matching cowgirl costumes and they played the part with gusto. They both had parties at their schools. I'd volunteered to photograph all the Kindergarten parties that day, which meant going in for the morning classes and coming back later in the afternoon to catch the PM kids. It was so hard. I wanted to tell everyone I saw what was going on, but it really wasn't the time or place. I was so sad, so angry, constantly on the verge of tears. We all get annoyed by people's thoughtlessness when it affects us, but that day, I was so angry. I was so hurt and angry. What does a polite person do with all that anger? I don't know. I do know that I have yet to go off on anyone, and for that, I am very proud.

So, we go back to the question, what do you do when your life is thrown upside down? First, you freak out. Next, you organize. I told everyone I knew of our situation. I updated my Facebook status. My husband did the same. It's time to network people! I was looking for leads anywhere for him, and myself, if that should happen. People rallied around us, offering their help in anything we needed. Someone said, come to Texas - there are plenty of jobs here! A great friend in North Carolina sent a bunch of links to jobs near her. One even turned into an interview and an informal offer that would be official if he wanted it. Unfortunately, it was for a non-profit with a tight budget. We didn't think it would be possible to live on that money, mostly due to the daunting task of selling a house in Michigan in front of us. Reluctantly, he turned it down. Little did we know... As far as job offers, that would be it. Oh, there’ve been interviews and second interviews. But never any more offers.

So now, we both study, trying to pad our resumes. He for technical certifications and I for teaching certification. My education will take a couple of years. He should pick up a cert next week.

I feel hopeless right now. The economy is crap for the whole country. I don't see this turning around. Is this the collapse of capitalism? Is this the end of the life we've all known? All I know is, I am tired of listening to people talk about it. These talking heads who aren't affected by this crisis. Oh, yeah, your retirement fund is slashed. Boo hoo. Our health coverage was taken away, our income is gone. We have children to support with nothing. Now, he gets unemployment, which covers our mortgage payment and leaves about $100 to cover an additional $1000 of bills. Thanks to the support of my parents, we are still in our house and paying our bills. But, I'm just not about the idea of helping us until we get back on our feet again. Ideally, that would be what they’re doing, but I don't see us getting back on our feet. Michigan has the highest unemployment rate in the country. It seems like a losing battle to try to find a job here. So, we could leave. My husband doesn't want to do it. Trying to sell a house in a dead area is a losing battle. How do we get out of here? Does anyone know? How does this story end?

Stirring up Sh*t for Obama

I've been busy causing trouble.
I've gone and been a liberal in public (maybe not a big deal to many, but I live in a very conservative area).
I'll write more later, but it's so lovely to speak my mind and find out who my real friends are.
Go Obama!

I Love School!

This is what my beloved almost 6-year-old exclaimed today. My heart nearly burst with pride and joy. Seriously. I worry about her regularly (of course, that's part of the motherhood contract). But, she's had trouble getting into the whole school thing. That's why we put her in Young 5's last year instead of Kindergarten. She has an October birthday, so in most states she wouldn't be old enough for Kindergarten anyway. But in Michigan, the cut-off date for turning 5 is December 1. A just wasn't ready. She refused to write anything but an 'A' for her name and had a grownup fill in the rest, couldn't stand coloring, and was essentially ready to move on before she started. Then she went to Young 5's. She had to write her entire name many times every day. By week 2, she had it down. She was coloring, even staying in the lines, by the end of the school year.

Now, she's in Kindergarten and she LOVES it!!!

I'm so glad we sent her to Young 5's last year. It would've been a shame to send her before she was ready and have her education experience start on a bad note. Now she's ahead of the class in many ways and confident.

What a great lesson for me in not rushing things and letting my child find her wings.